Dance wiv me.

I started having relationships with guys around 5 years ago. My first kiss with a guy was in Teen Spirit, he had lipstick on, and was about a foot taller than I was then. It felt good to finally do something I'd wanted to do, but couldn't, because back then I didn't know anyone gay. I met my first boyfriend a couple of months later. It wasn't a very good experience at all, I was used and I very much hate this person to this day. He ruined something that I should be able to enjoy with people I love. Only once have I thought I was in love, and I never had sex with him, but I don't think it would have been the special moment it should have been because of what happened to me with my first boyfriend.

As I am single now, all the relationships I have been in, obviously, have failed. Usually this is my fault, although I know in one case it was nothing to do with me. But I do tend to blame myself, especially for the relationships I end, one I wish I never had ended. It's usually something I do or say, or don't do or don't say.

I have learnt that relationships based on physical attraction alone do not work and, relationships that are based on personality alone don't work.

The mistakes I have made with relationships have been spectacularly bad sometimes, even though one did lead to something good.

I said to myself that I wouldn't get involved with anyone before I go away, which unsurprisingly, was advice I did not take. This was stupid, and I have ended up disappointed. I'm not upset, because I was not going to carry it through to when I move to London. I know I will find someone in that big city, that fits many of the boxes. I've only ever found one of those before. These are the people I am going to fall in love with, and the only people I am going to pursue in future.

I'm going to leave it on that positive note =]

Dan